Now, I understand

I know what he’s thinking, I understand now.

How often have you thought to yourself … I know, just by looking into their eyes, what he or she is thinking, by simply observing body language.

Have you ever said to yourself:

 ‘I wish I had the words?’

Only to find out that none were required, a simple action was enough. Whether that’s a nod or a shake of the head, we understand on an intimate level at times where words are simply not required.

This moment of telepathy usually occurs with those you know particularly well. It may be a partner, child or even a pet and more often than not this moment of instantaneous understanding between humans is overlooked as simply ‘co-incidence.’

Wouldn’t it be fabulous if world leaders could communicate, engage and mutually understand through telepathy? If people had the time and ability to express how they truly felt if the population could send messages straight to the top without the diatribe and red tape that confines the clarity of sanity…

Fleeting moments of profound communication are wonderful for the soul and are just as essential for the business to understand don’t you think?

So, Ben had been having troubles with his presentations. Or he thought he was having trouble … he felt the message just wasn’t coming out of his mouth.

‘So much to say and unable to say it.’

Take your time to deliver Ben, be specific when offering the message, presentation jitters come to all of us at some point and although we have not yet mastered the telepathic message as some have with text or email, once people understand that you are comfortable and wholly committed to your cause, your message will soon become clear.

It is then we find that people do business with who they understand, those they know, like and trust … almost telepathically.

Comfortable vs remarkable

‘Hey Charlie, I think I’m getting comfortable with this networking ‘thing’ now. I do understand when you say that it’s all about spending time, being familiar with the expectation, you’re right, it takes a while.’

Good things take time Ben …

the key is to stay the course and following through.

‘Well, I’m managing the routine now, gradually booking the appointments and I’m learning, so feeling happier.’

I can tell that Ben, just by you opening up and discussing the situation tends to show you are growing in confidence, understanding the process.

‘The process?’

The referral process. This is your ‘realisation,’ Ben, others are beginning to appreciate you as they see you grow, they come to understand your character, ask your advice and how you work. Just as you do with others.

Just now is the start of the process.

Continue with the visibility, book the meetings, the one to one and understand your marketplace. Learn from others and keep the antenna flying for possible introductions for others. The more you help, the better your ‘bizability.’

‘But I’m just getting comfortable Charlie, I’m happy where I am now.’

Where you are is great Ben. Not too comfortable now though because ‘comfortable’ brings stagnation and this is something that should never happen within your network.

Stay the course Ben, follow through, continue your path. If you are happy then the ‘process’ is working.

Next step is to begin to lose the comfort zone Ben… go the extra mile and actively pursue business on behalf of others – don’t just wait for it to happen, be the referral process you would like to see happening for you.

Nothing remarkable ever comes from being comfortable …

Talk about

Talk about others. It’s great for business.

Referrals are something we all aspire to, some of us go out of our way to cultivate the new business by doing all the ‘stuff’ we’re told by the gurus, those abundant soothsayers and community influencers.

So what happens when you do all that which you’re supposed to be doing only to find that the recommended ground work is just not working, literally, the only new life you’re hearing are those crickets again … away in the distance …

Let’s get unselfish. Good business comes our way when we stop worrying about why it’s not coming our way – have you noticed that?

Try this, it works for me, it may not be right for you just now but just give it a go – after all, it’s just those pesky crickets, right?

Each of us in business knows lots of other people, some we see more often than not and of course, it’s natural that those we do see most regularly are those we tend to want to help when required.

‘Help? Ok, but how?’ I hear you ask

Simply talk about them. Spread a little good news about your mates.

For instance, when you meet up with a friend and they ask:

‘How’s it going, what have you been up to?’

Avoid dwelling on me, me, me for just a minute …

Try telling them you met up with a great professional the other morning, someone who has a unique line of business and someone you would highly recommend.

Give them a reason why your mate is so referable. Talk them up, shine the light and really give your friend a reason to make mental notes as you both discuss …

‘OK, so I talk them up, but how is this helping me?’

Bear with me. Chances are the next conversation your friend has with you in mind he is going to also mention your recommended new best friend – he’s going to mention your mate and of course he’s going to talk about you, your business, how he knows what it is you do, and how well connected you really are.

Word of mouth, let’s not underestimate the power of a good conversation – especially when you are talking about someone … behind their back!

He’s no one hit wonder

 

Ben, it’s great to hear you enjoyed the holiday. Welcome back.

 

“Thanks, Charlie, I did enjoy the time away from the factory, I took the opportunity to do a lot of thinking …”

Holidays are good for thinking Ben, have another biscuit with the tea … what do we need to discuss?

Ok, I’m thinking of offering our tailor made line online, you know, the additional income stream you talked about? Networking is great although I’m not getting a lot of ‘hits’ with my engagement – any reason why do you think?”

Hits Ben? The online store is a great idea …

The efforts you put into your business, your people and your network are a progressive development of the ‘reliable, dependable, Ben.’ It’s about you becoming the person your contacts can rely on, not only for the so-called ‘hits’ but for direction, advice and support.

Sure, you will find and always welcome the odd single order for your fine, bespoke footwear although is that the end game here?

What do you mean? Of course, I want orders, that’s what I’m networking for isn’t it?”

Ben, anyone can buy a pair of shoes that suit the budget, we get free financial advice, accountancy solutions or websites in a box, logos for not much more than a fiver, it’s all ‘out there’ Ben.

The meaningful partnerships in business surpass all of the above. The reason those ‘in the know’ are networking is the fact that the road to fruition is that much shorter with the help of our colleagues. Even if your network is the slow-burn, the odd order here, the single referral there … think about what you are cultivating Ben.

Your scope of contacts – even over a short time networking while developing the relationships and trust is enormous. Think of the connections others have and who they are able to refer you to given the relationship. Never underestimate leverage. Think also of the advice and support, the range of services at your fingertips for the sake of caring about others a couple of hours per week.

It’s not about the ‘hits’ Ben, it’s about your leverage and quality of connections, who knows you and who may then introduce you to others.

Have faith Ben, you are no ‘one hit wonder.’

So, what else did you do on holiday apart from thinking about work?

Be you, get naked

 

‘We become part of the company that we keep, that’s for sure.’

 

I was having a conversation with a friend as we walked the local beach the other day. Brendon was up for the holiday and we were reminiscing somewhat. The dogs were doing their doggy thing and the wind was howling, but hey …

Brendon was telling me about a mutual friend, someone who was so busy playing catch-up through his social media accounts, he’d forgotten to live the life.

It’s not that Brendon was feeling neglected, it was, in fact, the understanding that our mutual friend was shadowing the life others, being led through a series of likes/follows/retweet/shares, whatever else.

So why do you think that is Brendon? Is it ‘the business he pursues?’

‘Undoubtedly it’s business but there is something else Charlie. I say that because he just does not see the good around him, what he has already, ‘it’s as if he is missing out if he’s not in touch.’

I kind of agreed, and I said so. We are all aware of the potential for new business with most entrepreneurs on-line and looking for the opportunity we’re surely missing one important point, aren’t we?

The news is in fact you.

It’s not what others have or what they offer or might do or save or sell or enhance …

Let’s use the social for what it is – as a sounding board for flavours. We need to offer our own newsworthy flavours and if we are to embrace the net for what it’s worth – let’s make it work for us and stop simply being ‘there’ for everyone else. Resist the temptation to be first, the envy that comes with missing out on the latest pic., the conversation. Be you.

So … what’s holding him back?

Most likely fear I said, fear that he won’t make it, anxiety that he is not ‘one of them’ and fearful that if he tries to be so and offers naked ambition, he may not be seen at all.

Hey, why be led by the flow of popular opinion when you have so much individuality to share with others? Show me a room full of naked ambition (ok, transparent then) individuals who are happy to confront their fears, those who are happy with that. Give me that option anytime.

Oops.

The dog had demonstrated her own needs and as I bent toward the sand to clean up after her I realised what I had become myself …

No, I can see what you are saying, right now is not my true vocation …

I could see what Brendon meant now. I could relate to that, I’d become a product of my own network. We are what we practice, the reality is, we become part of whom we spend the most time with.

Don’t we?

The Extraordinary

Surrounding ourselves with extraordinary friends, those of like minds, not only makes us feel good, it simply helps to get the job done, don’t you think?

I’m in the business of connecting people and although I’m more than comfortable having a room full of people – who perhaps don’t quite yet share my conviction of the powers of connectivity – I find the task of ‘technicolor presentation’ can be tough work at times.

After all, a room full of apparent strangers asking questions of each other is not a universal pleasure. A learning curve it could be said and not just for the aforementioned newbies either.

So therefore whenever I’m building these new groups, ‘the Forum of connectivity,’ I’m extremely lucky to be able to call upon those with an understanding of what it takes to go the distance, to follow the path of strategy for success.

It is mighty beneficial to include one or two network colleagues who have experienced the learning curve, taken off and bumped just a little coming in for the landing, a little bruised maybe, hugely better off for the experience … enlightened folk who have an understanding of the profound results networking may bring when the follow-up to that initial connection is delivered.

Connecting, really connecting for better business is essential if you wish to develop your referral potential. It can be fun of course (it should be fun) but never lose sight of the goal. Always follow-up and offer to help, find ways to be special, be the provider you’d like yourself to meet.

Strive to surround yourself with peers, those trusted friends who, like you, understand that by going the distance, doing extra when helping others is just what it takes to be extraordinary.

Consolidate the relationships by setting the example early, introduce those new connections to your trusted network, leverage those who work hard at being extraordinary by routine. Be remarkable and you cannot go wrong – your network will thank you for it.